Thursday, April 10, 2008

Little Boy J?

J . . . Between spoonfuls of pears, I thought I saw something today. I didn't expect it so soon, at only eight months, though deep inside I knew it would happen. I saw the little boy in you. Through the soft chubby cheeks, the lopsided grin, the arched brows, and steely blue eyes, I saw a little boy. Not a baby. Not my little baby boy.

I was scared. For a moment. I froze. What is happening?

In a moment you were back to yourself; fussing because I wouldn't let go of the spoon so that you could gum it to within an inch of its life. The little boy disappeared. My baby was back. But I know that sometime soon the little boy will be back. I'll greet him with open and loving arms, but I will miss my little baby J . . .

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42 comments:

Misty said...

Oh my heart just started to ache a little bit..... that is one of the hardest things for me.... watching my own children grow.... I always find myself wishing for that time back....

Anonymous said...

You know, the great thing about their growing up is when you get to see the glimpses of baby in their faces (I see it mostly when they sleep). Bittersweet, the whole thing.

Family Adventure said...

Hang on to every baby minute. Because, like I mentioned yesterday, I blinked and my boy started going to discos.

Give your baby a big snuggle from me :)

Heidi

Sass said...

I found some photos of Ellie on an old camera yesterday. She was 10 months old - gave me quite a shock to see how much she had changed.

SWC said...

Oh, I can relate all too well to this one having a 9 month old. It's happening so fast. Some day when they are "boys", I hope we can still see a glimpse of the baby. Something tells me that we will. I hope!

Amy said...

Though it can be a bitter-sweet as they grow, the next stage is usually better than the last. This is hard to understand until your in it. Enjoy every minute with him, don't wish time away but look forward to the memories he has yet to make! =)

KG said...

Oh I KNOW! Sometimes I look at my baby and think "He's almost a KID" and it scares the hell out of me. How did 8 months pass so quickly once he's here and yet SO DAMN SLOWLY when I was pregnant!

Flea said...

Isn't that the worst?! It happens with each child. Wait though - one day you'll look back at baby pictures and still see the baby in your boy.

Marmarbug said...

Not to depress you further but wait till he is like 3 and starts dressing like a little man. With underwear! UGH! IT KILLS ME!
Enjoy baby j while he is widdle.
Oh and looking back at Bean's baby shots puts me in a hysterical crying mode. Bud says I am a freak.

Angela DeRossett said...

Oh I so feel your pain... and it makes my heart hurt because that time goes so fast. My oldest is starting to give me glimpses of what he may be like as an adult. Cherish this time.

Lori said...

I have those moments still with Blake where he looks so much older than he is and I'm like... STOP you are getting too big too fast. But then I see how much he's changed, grown and matured and I say... yay my little guy is growing up

ahhh the ups and downs, ins and out, smiles and trials of motherhood!

Beth from the Funny Farm said...

Now, I am looking at my little boy and seeing the man emerging.

I feel Sad, happy, sad, happy. **going to go cry now**

Celebrate and cherish that sweet J!

Kat said...

It is heartbreaking, isn't it?

just jamie said...

***sigh***

wait until you see the teenager in him. :)

(actually, i only see it in my daughter which is scary. my son stays little boy, so far).

i think it's intersting that each new stage they enter, i think, oh *this* is my favorite, and then the next, oh *this* is my favorite... it's all so good.

Unknown said...

awe, they grow so quickly!

Angie @ KEEP BELIEVING said...

Having a now 5 and 6 year old, I have the exactly the opposite sensations - the ones where every so often I catch a glimpse of the baby again.

KEEP BELIEVING

Momisodes said...

*sniff* I remember that moment. What a bittersweet thing isn't it?

Today I held and rocked my big, heavy 2.5 year old in my arms....just because :)

Anonymous said...

You need to stop with making me tear up.. My 10 month old is quickly leaving baby behind for little boy and it is breaking my heart!!

Pam said...

Oh, that makes me sad....I have always wanted my kids to be responsible and independent, but as Ashlyn begins to buckle herself in her booster seat and open/close car doors herself...it makes me sad. Hang onto those baby moments!

Jennifer said...

i'm all teary. it does go fast, faster than you can imagine. i'm still trying to figure out what happned to my baby boy. he is in the living room playing mario racing game on the wii... where oh where did 4.5 years go? honestly i was there for it all, every day, hour, minute. Every memory and milestone, but still 4.5 years? wow. seems like only yesterday he was staring at me trying to memorize my face while nursing and i was staring right back in total amazement that this was really my baby... that i had made this beautiful life.
take TONS of pictures, and write down lots of memories. It does go too fast some days.
Lots Of hugs!!
xoxoxo Jenn

Lindsey said...

It happens all too fast. Soon he will be a toddler. Hold him every second he will let you!

Pregnantly Plump said...

I understand that completely. Some outfits make Little Elvis look like such a little man.

raising4boys said...

Cute post!! Oh how I wish they would stay little just a little bit longer :)

CC said...

I miss my babies too! My dd is only 2.5 but I already can scarcely remember what she was like as a baby!

Aunt Becky said...

Oh sister, I know what you mean. They grow so quickly, stupid as that sounds. So, so true.

Kamis Khlopchyk said...

It happens so fast and without warning. But you know what? Each stage has been better than the last.

Look forward not back and you will have nothing but joy in your heart, I promise.

And that's why we take like a bazzilion pictures of them. I do wish that you could capture the softness of their of soft head nestled against your cheek though! That's what I miss the absolute most. And the belly laughs.

Anonymous said...

Mine is 13 months old and he is more and more little boy by the day. Those "little boy" moments come more and more often. It's bittersweet, I know!

OHmommy said...

Oh man... it is the worst. Why can't they just stay little for a longer time? :)

Mighty Morphin' Mama said...

Aw, babies growing up is such a bittersweet thing. We anxiously await each new milestone and rejoice at every new age, but we mourn the little babes they leave behind.

Jules said...

I'm with you there. You turn around, and poof! Another month gone!
I loved, simply loved my kiddies when they were babies. Now they're older. And bigger. And there's more to love!

Cheffie-Mom said...

How beautiful!!! I know exactly what you mean. Cherish every second...bc pretty soon they grow up to be adults and you wonder what happened! :)

McMommy said...

This post touched my heart!

tommie said...

savor those moments! My little boy is 4 and 3/4 and don't you dare forget those 3/4. He doesn't want me to kiss him...so I have to sneak them!

Bad Momma said...

I can remember each time I was pregnant, wondering what my baby would look like. When the boys were babies, I wondered what they would look like as boys, now sometimes I will try to picture what they will look like as adults.

Make sure you take plenty of photos, the time flies by fast! Once in a while we look back at old photos and giggle.

Tara R. said...

Such a sweet post... my own children are coming out of their teens now (my oldest will be 19 in just a few months) I can still see that baby in them sometimes. It is a wonderful journey, enjoy every step along the way.

Burgh Baby said...

I do not enjoy those moments one bit. I just want to enjoy the now and not think about the future too much. It's hard when they go and make expressions that are far beyond their years.

MamaGeek @ Works For Us said...

Oh I felt this post in my left aorta. I so know what you mean. WHERE does the time go. You blink and they grow so fast.

Beautiful post!

Wineplz said...

my older baby is nearly 4...want to talk about looking like a little boy!...but I still see a little bit of my baby still in him. *sigh*

Anonymous said...

This is so sweet! I saw the photos and can't believe how quickly he is growing.

Cynthia said...

Chicky, you brought tears to my eyes...My babies just left, and a little girl and a little boy are in their place. I am happy and sad at the same time:)

just jamie said...

got something for you...

krissy said...

Ooohhhh, I miss my 10yr old being a baby so I feel your pain here.

I keep telling my hubby that we should adopt. My daughter threatened to pack her bags and move out because she doesn't want a baby in this house!

I guess I won't be holding a baby any time soon! *sigh*

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