Monday, March 3, 2008

Monday Mission: This is a message from . . .

A voice mail message(s). This mission is tied directly to yesterday's post about My First Crush.

4:30 PM
Beep: Hi, um, this is Laski. I was wondering if you would like to maybe meet for dinner. Denny's would be cool. Um, or White Castle. We don't even have to have dinner, we could have lunch, if you don't like dinner. I mean, it is totally cool if you don't like dinner, lunch is usually pretty good and I know a few places that serve lunch. I mean, they serve dinner, too, but their lunches are pretty good. Anyway, I just figure you might be hungry and, wait, not that you are always hungry and that you need me to eat lunch with you, just that by chance if you are hungry, maybe you would want to eat lunch with me. Yeah, so, um, if you want to have dinner, I mean lunch or whatever, dinner, lunch, doesn't matter, you can call me at 555-2221. I'll be waiting. I mean, not waiting for the call, but you know, I'll be busy, but I'll keep the phone nearby. Whatever, just, like, call when you get a chance. Oh, um, if you want breakfast, we could always do that, whatever you want. Wherever. Just let me know. Bye. See ya. Bye. *giggle*

4:34 PM
Beep: Um, Hi, Stallion, it's Laski again. I was just thinking. Um. Would you maybe want to see a movie instead? I have a gift card and it would probably . . . wait, there's only a dollar on it . . . hey, that would make our popcorn even cheaper! Not that you want popcorn. Candy is totally cool. We could get some Swedish Fish or maybe some . . . oh, maybe you like nachos. Nachos are awesome. I mean the prices are bogus, but, wait, I don't want you to think you have to pay. I mean, I'm a girl of the 90's and I totally have my own money. Not that you don't have money, 'cause I'm sure you do 'cause you are all smart and stuff and I know you have a job [I know this because I am a STALKER]. . . um . . . CLICK

4:38
BEEP: I think your machine cut me off, um, it's Laski. Again. Anyway . . . I think there is a Meg Ryan film playing and maybe you would like to meet up at the theater and . . . um, that is if you are into romantic comedies. I mean, I don't really care. I like romance, but comedies are totally cool. Or, maybe action adventure. That would be fine. I know I'm a girl and all, but I'm totally into seeing stuff get blown up. Wait, that doesn't mean I'm violent or anything, I just figure you might be into that sort of thing. Um, don't take that the wrong way, what I meant to say was that as a guy you might find stuff getting blown up more interesting than some of the mushy romantic stuff. I mean, not that all romantic stuff is mushy, it it just that I know that sometimes . . . you know, there is a Disney cartoon . . . maybe we could just see that.

4:44 PM
Beep: Hey, Stallion. It's me. Again. Listen, if you aren't hungry or if you don't want to catch a movie, we would maybe meet at the mall and just hang out. I mean, not that you don't have better things to do or anything, but it might be fun to just window shop. Um, I'm not saying you don't have the money to buy anything, duh, of course you do, I'm just saying you don't have to shop unless you need new t-shirts or something. I mean, your t-shirts are totally cool and you really don't need any new ones. We could stop by the record store and check out some new tunes . . . I'm really loving the new U2. Oh, yeah, wait, you um, like rap. Rap is totally cool. I mean, I USED to like U2, but I am getting way into rap and stuff. Rap is awesome. MC Hammer, he like, um, like, bitchin' . So, if you want to meet, um, call me and we can you know, meet up.

This is why a very uncool fifteen-year-old girl should NEVER ask her crush out on a date. These messages are BASED on truth . . . To be quite honest, what actually happened is far, far worse. Poor, poor fifteen-year-old me . . .

This post is in participation with Monday Missions sponsored by Painted Maypole. Today's mission is to post as a voicemail message. Head on over to PM's to see more Monday Missions.

26 comments:

Kathryn said...

Hehehe. That reminded me of Swingers. I was yelling in my mind as I was reading, "Oh stop, dear girl. Hang up the phone!".
I am so glad I listened to my grannie when she said, "Don't you EVER call a boy!". I know I would have sounded exactly like that.
Great post!

Pam said...

Tee hee hee! Oh to be 15 again! Actually, I don't want to be 15 again. It was too scary and I don't want to relive all that. I could often hear myself talking in my head saying "stop talking NOW" but my mouth just kept on going!

The Immoral Matriarch said...

*lol*

I could totally hear that!

Kami said...

So true of all 15 year old girls. You are not alone.

I am a little bit grateful that I never had the courage to ask anyone out.

tommie said...

How funny! We had a very strict rule of no boy calling and no calls after 8 in our house growing up....thanks the Lord. I am sure I could have humiliated myself plenty!

Kristi said...

Oh, I feel your pain. Aren't we all glad we don't have to live that period again?

Cheri said...

Darling concept for a post. LOL!

Kimmylyn said...

I am laughing over here because as Kathryn it totally reminded me of Swingers..

God I hated 15.. and 14 and 16.. I hated the teenage years period.

Karen said...

I was never a typical teen. Thank goodness. I'd have sooner died than done that stuff.

Of course the only fun I had involved my horse.

Misty said...

I totally cringe when I think about the things I did when I was 15 years old.... as a wild child..... oh dear..... maybe I should go repent.

RJTrue said...

I giggled out loud through the whole thing!! Love it.

Allie Boniface said...

Love it :) Ah yes, the glory days of adolescence...

Jennifer said...

this is freakin' hilarious!! :) I have so left messages similar to these, although maybe not so many of them at once. lol :)
to think one day i will hear messages to my son from some crushin' girl like these and that my girls will leave some boys crushin' messages like these themselves. :) too funny.
thanks for sharing.
have a great day.
hugs, jenn

Angela said...

You've been awarded...come get 'em.

suchsimplepleasures said...

that...is why i never called guys!! because, the message would have sounded like that...and, i would have obsessed about it...forever!!
hilarious!!!

Law Student Hot Mama said...

Sweet! When I was 15, I dated this older man who was the captain of the soccer team and a total stud. I went to his sports banquet where he received numerous awards . . . the sports banquet where I wore these kick-ass heels and sundress combo . . . only to fall on my arse in front of the entire soccer team. Yeah, it was awesome. The dress was all the way up to my neck, exposing my bra and underwear. I was awesome!

huddtoo said...

LOL

Thanks so much for the chuckle!

Lori said...

that is too funny... oh to to be 15 and silly again

painted maypole said...

thanks for playing along! and, um, I think I have left similar messages.

at least your story has a fabulous ending, with a whole new man. :)

Lizzy in the Burbs said...

Oh,..I'm laughing with you, not at you, I promise! We've all been there! Hey, give yourself credit for having enough self confidence to make those calls! That took guts! Aren't you glad we aren't teenagers anymore? :o)

Lizzy

Amy said...

Oh my gosh, HILARIOUS! Been there and not wanting to remember it.

abby p said...

Oh, hee hee. That is so true! I swear I've had conversations like that more than I care to admit!

Mimzie said...

You know how people put LOL for lack of something better or well thought out? Well, turns out this really did make me laugh out loud!

Huckdoll said...

O..M..G!! Bahaha, lol, hehe..

Such a funny post...not many people can make me lol - this did, because I know it too well.

Marmarbug said...

Hi there! Stumbled on your blogand LOVE it. Sorry about your 15 year old crush. I never did the phone thing but I remember falling head over heels for some serious losers. Ah the teen years.

BusyDad said...

Let me be the 10th person to mention Swingers! haha. Hey, those all sound like my typical comment that I leave on my female friends' pages on the buzz. Some things you just can't outgrow ;)

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